Dad here. It’s probably going to be me from here on out, so I’ll just stop saying it when I start.
Sometimes I discipline you for things and you deserve to know why. When you don’t want to eat your food, I’ll give you a few chances and then I’ll begin counting backwards from five. You have learned that if I get all the way to one before you eat, it means you’re going to be punished. Contrary to what you currently think, I don’t do this because I hate you.
Punishing you is the hardest thing I do. I desperately want nothing more than to comfort you when you’re sad, stop you from crying when I can, and keep you happy no matter what. But that isn’t my job as a parent. If it were, you’d eat nothing but candy night and day and you would run the house. You would probably be diabetic and have scars out the wazoo as well. Parenting would be much easier if I could simply be your adult friend.
Your go-to phrase for the last few months has been “You’re supposed to give people second chances.” Believe me, kiddo- you get second, third, fourth, fifth, sixth, seventh, (etc) chances. By the time you go to bed each night, you’re easily on your 25th chance of the day at a minimum. The fact that you still get to have dessert most nights after dinner is simply amazing to me and a point of contention between your mother and I.
One day, you will have to discipline someone for something and you will know the feeling. I can only hope that I raise you well enough to know three things:
- It doesn’t feel good to punish someone. It shouldn’t.
- Even though it doesn’t feel good, you know you’re doing the right thing.
- Domestic violence is not punishment and is never acceptable.
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